Learning to Reframe: Sadness

There’s a scene in Broadcast News where Holly Hunter, a producer of a high-stakes news program, starts her day by unplugging the phone and giving herself an allotted time to ball her eyes out.

There is no reason to cry. At least -- not yet. But Holly knows the stress and mental cost of her job. She knows herself as a human and the high level of performance she expects from herself (and others.) This ritual is a way of allowing a release, cleaning the slate, opening up her reserves for whatever might take place that day.

What is so magnificent is that it is not a one-off scene. You will see it again. You will see it when you realize the pressure she's under and what the repercussions might be if she were NOT to do this thing. It is a simple moment of silence (then sobbing), then: onward. It is brilliant because even in a very beautifully flawed perfectionist, it shows her own self-care. The scene shows her acknowledgment of her limits and her fallibility (which is saying a lot from her character’s perspective).

This is what we mean when we say that sadness is not necessarily a bad thing. It's an unpleasant feeling. It is also entirely human. It erupts from so many fractures of context -- from frustration, anger, or exhaustion to true loss, depression, hopelessness, or despair. Setting aside some time to lay down the facade could be beneficial.

So allow yourself a moment of sadness. You don’t need a “reason.” Adulting is reason enough. 2020 is reason enough. Being human is reason enough. Allow yourself a moment of grace... unplug... and let go.

You might be surprised at the benefit and the relief in the release.